So will you like it if i narrate to you how i met a girl named Saudat Umar? Yes i posted out her full name because she vex meeeeeee! 😏
So! The first day i met Saudy (Saudat) was one sarturday morning at a friend’s Wedding, in Garki Abuja. Saw this pretty lady walking majestically with gorgeous look, i didn’t know when i sounded like davido (Chiiiiiiiiiiii! Osheeeey Baddest) i wanted to just stand up from where i was seated, walk up to her and just smell her perfume. She be like fine wine.
When the wedding was going to an end (because it was a christian wedding) the pastor said prayers for we the singles;
Pastor said before the end of 2020, we will meet our spouses.
Guess whose amen was the loudest? (Saudy) i was looking at her with corner eye.
The Pastor ended the prayer after so much anointing.
The wedding ended. I felt renewed as I stood outside the wedding hall, patiently waiting for this angel to walk by and shoot my shot. I spent almost 10 minutes waiting, this girl no come out oh. (Abi na she one go prepare the couple’s bed for the first night ni? 🙄)
A friend hurriedly rushed to me to tell me the angel i am waiting for at the exit is already at the road site waiting for taxi (my eyes turn red instantly) about three commercial buses passed by her but they all refused to let her in when she showed them a N1000 note which was the only denomination she had.
Fortunate enough for me we came to the event with a Cab, 😁😁 Are you Rinking what am Rinking? 😋
Finally, i appeared overtaking like to cabs, voooooom! With my empty cab. I agreed to give her a lift at no cost when she presented the N1000 note she had. She entered the cab and conversation started.
Me: How the wedding been dey?” I asked.
Me: So wetin be your name?”
She was thinking in her mind and i was hearing it loudly, (I’m like that so don’t judge me)
Saudy in Her Mind: Nothing I dread most than cab drivers and okada riders that find it difficult to just shut up and drive. But I will act polite to show my gratitude for his free ride. Good thing I will get rid of him fast as there is no traffic. I estimate a ten minutes drive at most.
“I’m Speedy.” She said.
That was the first name that came to her mind when she sighted an empty packet of speedy biscuit. You can’t blame her, to her i had no business knowing her real name.
Me: “Speedy? Which kind name be dat? Na AKA abi your real name?” I asked.
Saudy: Real name.
Me: You fine well well. I go like make we become friends.
After all my talking she didn’t say anything again (which kind girl be this one now?)
When we got to the nearest bus stop at her house, I gripped her palm and demanded for her phone number.
“But I don’t know you. I don’t give out my number like that to strangers” she said to me
“Na why I dey ask for your number so I go know you. I wan make we become close friends. You sef no even ask me my name.”
She pretended not to hear me.
As she made to alight from the vehicle, i pulled her back and angrily said, “Digestive abi wetin you call yourself wey my N150?”
Her surprise at the new turn of events had her speaking pidgin this time.
“Oga but you talk sey you go carry me for free.” .
“Oh, so you don enjoy my motor but to give me your number dey hard you.”
She took out the N1000 and flung it at me.
I ransacked my pockets for change. When I couldn’t come up with her balance, I went out of the car, looked around for what could benefit me i didn’t see anything so i bought N150 worth of shabba leather (Nylon) from a roadside hawker and shoved her balance into her palm.
“Yeye girl! You think say na only you sabi osho free. Fine you no even fine.” see her Nyash like Obangede road bumps.
Abeg na joke i dey oh….
Abeg make una help me wish the stubborn girl a sounding happy birthday, Inya!!! Happy birthday more of it in good health long life and prosperity…. Hooray!!!!!!!